Yard TV

Watching The Grass Grow

Forget Home and Garden and just give me the Yard. Yard TV broadcasts an unending expanse of green. Sit back and watch the grass grow from the comfort of your living room 24 hours a day. There’s always plenty of sun and never a sunburn; always plenty of rain, but you never get wet. Yard TV. All of the fun, none of the allergens.

Flight path finder

Here’s my latest web 2.0-a-riffic, GoogleMaps, GPS, mashup thingamabob idea: a website that allows users to view common flightpaths for a particular location and evaluates the location based on frequency of flyovers and noise level. Would be a great tool for noise-sensitive home buyers. Or for flyover collectors, plane spotters, etc.

Chez Stadium

Fine food for your sporting venue.

Sick of eating bland, boiled hotdogs at the game? Then washing it down with watery beer? Chez Stadium sets out to make stadium food as exciting as the game. From gourmet sausages on fresh-baked sourdough buns to peanuts tossed with our special herb and spice blends. We serve our nachos with fresh salsa and actual cheese (no plastic!). Chez Stadium updates all your favorite sporting foods, including a wide selection of local and craft-brewed beer. Watching the game has never tasted so good! Chez Stadium: the Babette’s Feast of Baseball.

[Of course, when this really gets going we’ll have to wrest the name from this promising artist: Chez Stadium. Or maybe we’ll work ouut some synergistic theme-song deal…]

[[Oh, and let’s go Mets!]]

[[[Is it even baseball season right now?]]]

Archimedes Screw Highchair

The bottom section of a highchair is a large archimedes screw, as if it were wearing a skirt with spiral pleats. Placing a child in the chair activates a motor that causes the screw to slowly turn, raising bits of dropped food to within the child’s reach.

Pork Pie Hat

A Bacon-themed Restaurant

Who doesn’t love bacon? (OK, except for vegetarians and those keeping kosher…) So how about a restaurant where every dish has bacon in it? Pork Pie Hat will serve the usual bacon-laced goodness for appetizers (bacon wrapped scallops), salads (spinach salad), sandwiches (BLT) and entrees (coq au vin); along with unusual bacon offerings such as desserts (apple pie with a woven bacon crust, bacon crrme brulee) and cocktails (the bacon-tini, or course!) Other popular dishes include a tasting platter of artisanal bacon varieties, bacon and melon, battered bacon rings, chocolate covered bacon bits (bacon-nets)…the list goes on. Diners may be asked to present a note from their physician or else sign a waiver before ordering.